A sphere of Silver. The color of none yet the color of many.

3:08 AM Why are you guys still reading this. wtf man, tsk you guys should be ashamed of prying into other people's personal life.

10:22 PM I spent like a near one and a half hour staring at my 3rd year Prescribed and Complimentary Elective Courses slip arguing with myself what I wanted to choose so that my life in Year 3 won't be hell.

In the end I put Digital Matte Painting in all three choices for my PE and Audio Creation, Digital Photography and Acting in my CE. Then at the very last minute I /facepalmed at my stupidity and canceled out Audio Creation and Digital Photog and swapped those places. Fuck the fact that I will face hell sooner or later for doing that, but I'm gonna go for the one that I have the interest in.

I just very well hope Ms Pat will take my PE choices with a rather more opened mind. = 3=

6:41 PM Well, CNY mood came and went, it was fun to hang out with my cousins and chat about what we did last year.

I'm doing CODPIT now, I think i've surrendered to the sad fact that i'm merely doing this to pass this effin course. I had quite a motivation to ace this module at first, but because of some things here and there, clueless teammates who needed to be spoonfed, i sort of gave up. Abit sian, but i just hope to get this over with, and re start this project as my own creation some time later.

I think i'm starting to get over the fact with Clubs. I'm just wushing the best and hope Clubs can stay as much as how we were during the past days.

11:29 PM So apparently I lost my thumbdrive. I'm praying that i'll get it back. Lots of personnel work in there, as well as homework that I don't wanna redo.


I'm not the type that forgets my thumbdrive.. I'm not sure whats gotten into me lately, proably all the stress and shit. Meh.

12:45 AM Spring cleaning = Nose marathon. The dust in my room, i can't say how many dust storms rolled through me when I had to clean up piles of animation paper from last year.

Stupid blocked nose is giving me a headache at the same time.


I think I've been quite busy cleaning, I've went ahead and temporary forgot the things that's bugging me.

Mmmm. Felt a bit lighter after seeing a cleaner room, oddly.

12:46 AM And yet today held a surprise for me when I knew the development for Clubs. I was quite torn about it, but i know, even if i didnt want to, it'll be better that way.

Diamonds and I talked more, she isn't really in a good situation either, but right now, all I can, and want, is to give her the emotional support she may need. The place that we talked about, the place where we all belong, it'll be there, and we'll be there. (:

I told Nine today about my situation either on the way home. She was kind, and she understood and just that I am grateful for it. Thank you for listening to my soft rambles, and it was interesting, to know more of you too.


I kinda am going through some rough tearings of emotions. My family isnt of the best condition, and my lack of effort in my studies has started to affect myself due to some guilt-talk, which i then realized was necessary and of course some other pesonnal matters. Thanks for everyone who listened to my troubles, I always feel abit better when you guys do.

When Wilson and I talked, he pointed out that I looked quite emotionless some of the time, and that he had taken it as usual for it.

Well, that's not it actually. I don't put up this face normally.
It's when I'm feeling down, deep in thoughts and crap.
I don't really want to tell people more about myself, I don't want people to think im putting that face up to gain attention, to look as though i need the pity and concern all the time.
But then, in the end, after being devoid of it, I.. kinda yearn for being looked out for.
I really do hope, and want friends that cares about you welfare, not just, wish and hope that your emo period goes by quickly, and laugh around as just 'friends'
I like to be among people, I like to entertain, I like to be popular, I want to look out for friends that I know that truly cares, I want to fix my fucked up face and in my breaking heart, I like Clubs.

To Kach, fight on! I've said much to you on msn, so there's don't need to worry. I am sure we never seen you in the way you had seen yourself as, you will always be Kach.



And so what's the next hand the deck will show to me?

2:06 AM I had a good dream yesterday night.

I visited beautiful places, I met old friends, and my current friends. We met in a mansion/palace like place, and Clubs and I had were on better terms than before. In the end someone unexpectedly turned up, which I didnt mind, and something unexpected happened, which I didnt mind more, lol, and well, when I woke up from my dream, I was grinning and wanted myself to go back to sleep, slightly cursing myself why I ever woke up. hahaha.


I enjoyed the dream, but after a few hours of Codpit i turned moody. Zzz. Lousy shits.